Surreal

Just taking a moment here to reflect on the fact that we are so close...teetering on the edge of our "3rd trimester" of adoption.

In the busy days, it is easy to concentrate on the task at hand: dossier prep, fundraising...and everyday things; breakfast, the getting-ready-for-school-tornado, paying bills, cleaning up, building towers of blocks and crashing into them with the thousands of hotwheels cars and trucks we have in the playroom, dinner, baths, bedtime stories...

But there, in every activity that we do, I see Danil's little face.  In the rearview mirror, I can see the empty seat in the van where he will sit.  When I put Chase to bed, he's there, laying in the bed on the opposite wall.  When we eat dinner, I wonder if I should pick up another booster seat for the empty chair, or will Danil be able to peer over the table without one?  When we walk into the store, he's there holding his brothers' hands on the way to get a free cookie from the bakery.

Oh, how I wish I knew what was going on over there!  Our dossier arrived in U****** yesterday.  We are waiting on news of it being submitted.  Are our other papers there already?  The ones that we could send ahead of time to begin speaking for him?  Does anyone at the orphanage know that we are coming for him?

And even heavier than that thought...when will his family be notified?  I cannot even begin to imagine the torn feelings that come with giving a child up for adoption...what the situation must be.  But it seems to be done out of love...out of wanting the best option for him.  But how must that feel to know that your prayers for a family have been answered...but that will ultimately and finally take your child away- halfway around the world- from you?  I just know that it must be a huge flurry of emotions.

So, prayers for a near SDA appointment date, and prayers of comfort for Danil and his birth family.